This is not a "how to have a difficult conversation" article. If the person in your life is a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath, there is no productive conversation to have. There is no negotiation that ends in mutual understanding. There is only extraction.
The Dark Room Escape Protocol was designed by Dr. Johnathan Hines for exactly this situation. Five phases. Each one builds on the last. Skip a phase and you risk getting pulled back in.
Phase 1: Recognition
See the predator clearly. Name what is happening. This is the phase most people are stuck in when they take the Dark Room Assessment. You sense something is wrong, but you have not fully accepted the reality yet. Recognition means looking at the pattern without minimizing, excusing, or explaining it away. The predator is what they are. Naming it is the first step to freedom.
Phase 2: Documentation
Begin quietly building your evidence. Keep a private journal. Screenshot text messages. Save emails and voicemails. Note dates, times, witnesses. Do not tell the predator you are doing this. Do not tell anyone who might relay information back to them. This phase is invisible. You are preparing your case while they still think you are compliant.
Phase 3: Preparation
Secure your finances. Open a separate bank account they do not know about. Begin building a support system of people the predator has not compromised. Identify safe housing. Consult an attorney if there are legal entanglements. Create a detailed exit plan with specific dates and logistics. Preparation takes time. Do not rush it. But do not stall either. Preparation without execution is procrastination.
Phase 4: Execution
Leave. Not after one more conversation. Not after one more chance. Not after the holidays. Leave when you have completed your preparation. Execute the plan with precision and speed. This is not a breakup. It is an extraction. Do not explain. Do not negotiate. Do not wait for their response. Get out.
Phase 5: Fortification
Seal the door behind you. Block all communication channels. Establish firm boundaries with anyone who might serve as a conduit back to the predator. Begin healing through faith, community, and professional coaching. The predator will attempt to hoover you back. Love bombing. Threats. Guilt. Flying monkeys. Fortification is the phase where you build walls strong enough to withstand all of it.
The full protocol with detailed instructions for each phase is in The Dark Room. If you need a guide through this process, Dr. Johnathan Hines offers private coaching designed specifically for men escaping manipulative relationships.